New Years Resolution Update

So before posting my first beauty related post in like 8 months (so sad) I figured I would do an update on my last post.

Let’s see where I am with keeping up with 2017’s resolutions.

5 Resolutions for Everyday Life

1. Keep track of the good things, so the bad things don’t seem quite so bad.

Update: This actually wasn’t that hard to do. I found out soon after this post that I was pregnant. I made a point even with my previous miscarriages to treat this pregnancy like a gift and not let the negative thoughts weasel their way into my brain. Anyone who has struggled with pregnancy loss will know what I mean. 

2. Go on more adventures, especially the free kind.

Update: I definitely was trying to do this but unfortunately life got a little in the way and the first trimester exhaustion kept me in a lot. I did however go to several antique shows with my mom, the beach with friends and some other random festivals.

3. Don’t be afraid of change, sometimes it’s for the best.

Update: This is something I will always struggle with. I do not like change. Says the 17 week along pregnant girl whose life is about to change in the most drastic way. 

4. Make sure the special people in my life know how special they are.

Update: This has been easier than expected. I think my hormones are making me more thankful for the special people in my life, that or my hormones are just making me more soft. Blame everything on being pregnant.

5. Be happy.

Update: People who struggle with depression will always have this as a resolution. It is just one of those things that no matter how happy you are, you think you could be happier, that something else could make you happier. But so far so good on this one.

5 Resolutions for the Blog

1. Pre plan posts and create a schedule.

Update: Clearly a giant fail. 

2. Keep up with the posting schedule previously mentioned.

Update: Again a giant fail.

3. Read more blogs and comment on as many as possible.

Update: Not a giant fail but still a fail. I will do better, I miss reading all of your posts. Comment below your latest and I promise I will come read/comment on it!

4. Worry less about how many people actually read my blog.

Update: Definitely got this one down since I ignored my blog for 3 months.

5. Don’t let the day job get in the way of enjoying my blog.

Update: It wasn’t so much the day job as it was being pregnant with a full time job. I go to sleep at 9…. I am such a old lady. 

Hope you guys enjoyed the update! Let me know how your resolutions are going down in the comments and stay tuned for my April Ipsy Glam Bag review!

New Years Resolutions

So in the past I mentioned how I believed New Years resolutions were cursed. This year I have decided that while I still believe that there are some things I would really like to accomplish this year and they may be things you all can relate to. Here it goes:

5 Resolutions for Everyday Life

1. Keep track of the good things, so the bad things don’t seem quite so bad.
2. Go on more adventures, especially the free kind.
3. Don’t be afraid of change, sometimes it’s for the best.
4. Make sure the special people in my life know how special they are.

5. Be happy.

5 Resolutions for the Blog
1.Pre plan posts and create a schedule.
2. Keep up with the posting schedule previously mentioned.
3. Read more blogs and comment on as many as possible.
4. Worry less about how many people actually read my blog.
5. Don’t let the day job get in the way of enjoying my blog.

The Beauty Lover Tag

If you could have anyone in the world do your makeup, who would it be?
Joyce Bonelli, the go to makeup artist and friend of Khloe Kardashian.

What’s your top makeup tip?
Eye shadow primer. It makes ALL the difference.

What one makeup item could you not live without?
Anastasia Beverly Hills Brow Wiz & Brown Gel

What one skincare item could you not live without?
Daily facial moisturizer

What are you worst at when it comes to applying makeup?
Highlighting/Contouring

What’s your biggest pet peeve when it comes to beauty?
Cost. Beauty is art but it’s also a trend that many companies are currently cashing in on. This increased hype and easy access to professional products has increased demand which means constantly increasing costs.

What’s your favorite makeup era?
The 80’s, all those electric neon colors.

What’s your guilty pleasure product?
Anything Christian Louboutin beauty.

What’s your underdog product?
Sephora waterproof liquid eye liner

What’s your favorite makeup product of 2016?
SEXY Too Faced eye shadow palette

Fragile

Sharing this is healing for me. So if your bothered by sad stories or TMI then don’t read it because I refuse to apologize for finally acknowledging my feelings.

I have suffered two pregnancy losses.
My belief is that I have not properly acknowledged these losses. Which if you knew me wouldn’t seem that surprising. When it comes to pain, sadness, loss, or vulnerability I tend to push these feelings deep down where no one can see them. I pride myself on being strong, level headed and rational. For whatever reason I categorized my pregnancy losses into the ‘frivolous emotion’ category and down they went into this box in my body where I keep everything that makes me uncomfortable.
But I am not sure I can hold it in anymore. The problem is holding in some emotions means they just manifest into other emotions. For me its anger, bitterness, jealousy and for those who don’t know what I went through I look like a psychotic bitch.
So it’s time to tell my story…
I met the love of my life when I was 15. I’m a lucky bitch right? We have now been together for 11 years, living in sin for the past 7 years, and I wouldn’t change a thing (but don’t tell him that).
We like most couples want to start a family, we also wanted to be a younger family, so we started trying to conceive when we were in our mid twenties. A couple years of trying and nothing was a bit discouraging but I could agree with the old adage “a baby will come when the time is right”.
I believed that was true so when one Friday morning before work I realized my period was pretty overdue I took a pregnancy test. It was positive….
If you have ever been pregnant I am sure you will understand when I say I was a mother the moment I saw those two little lines. Because in that moment everything changes. You want to be the best person you have ever been so that you can give the best to the tiny life growing inside you.
It was my 26th birthday.
I went to work made up an excuse to go get a quick blood test to confirm that day. I was already acting pregnant. I spent the whole weekend pretending nothing had changed when in reality EVERYTHING had changed. I celebrated my birthday with my friends and family all the while glowing on the inside believing next year I would have a new little person to celebrate with.
Unfortunately that wouldn’t happen.
I waited to tell my fiance because I wanted it to be special. I set a camera up, threw a couple of blue and pink paint swatches on our extra bedroom wall. When he came home from work I asked him what color he’d like to paint the walls, his face was priceless when I pulled out the positive test. We took the next day off to relax and enjoy our new reality. We shopped for the best pregnancy food and I made my first prenatal appointment.
Everything was perfect.
Almost a week after my birthday I woke up to pain in my abdomen and some medium bleeding. I rushed to google (which I wouldn’t recommend) to confirm what I already knew was happening. Panic set in because I hadn’t even met my Dr yet how could this even be happening. I hid in that extra bedroom with the swatches still stuck to the wall while my fiance got up and unknowingly started his day.
After his shower he found me on the couch in tears. I couldn’t even look at him when I told him what was happening. I am the strong one, I am the logical one and I didn’t want him to see the fear and embarrassment I was feeling.
Yes, my first reaction to my pregnancy loss was embarrassment. What kind of woman was I that my body couldn’t keep this baby alive. I assured him I would be ok I called the Dr office and they said I could come in right away. But I wasn’t ok and he wouldn’t leave so he called my mom. She didn’t even know I was trying to have a baby let alone that I was pregnant. I hadn’t had time to tell her I wanted it to be special. Instead she found out she could have been a grandma from her future son in law while her only daughter broke to pieces in bed unable to speak.
Some of the best things about my mother is that she knows when to just be there but not say too much. Her being there for 10 minutes reminded me that I wasn’t raised to lay in bed and cry. I was raised to get up, get it together, and get some answers.
So my mother took me to the Dr who confirmed what I already knew. I listened as she told me she was sorry and what I needed to look out for as my body ‘passed’ the pregnancy. I made an appointment to get my blood drawn in a week to confirm my body was returning to its pre-pregnancy state.
As usual I acted like I was fine. I told the Dr as she said for the third time how sorry she was that ‘it’s fine’. I went with my mom when she suggested getting some food and going to a nearby mall. Mostly because I didn’t want to go home.
So I never let myself fall to pieces. I couldn’t because I told myself these typical things:
 
You are young, you have time.
 
Well at least you know you can get pregnant. 
 
It’s not like the pregnancy lasted that long. 
 
Other women have it way worse.
 
Don’t tell anyone. They will only look at you like a victim, like there is something wrong with you.
 
That was the BIGGEST mistake.
The lack of acknowledgement, the lack of grieving has festered and made me angry. I can’t find joy in others pregnancies or even their children. I get angry so easily around people who treat their pregnancies like the easiest thing in the world. Like it has somehow enlightened them to a place I could only understand if I was a parent. I cringe when people bring up having babies, especially when they refer directly to me having children. It’s not their fault they don’t know. But it hurts, every time, and that is why I wrote this.
Here is something I want everyone who has ever been pregnant to know: we became mothers the moment we became pregnant. Motherhood didn’t end when my pregnancy did. Nor did it the second time this past February. Motherhood is creating a life and knowing in your deepest heart that you would do anything to protect that little light inside you. Motherhood is grieving that little light when it is gone too soon.
One day we will all be able to hold our light and watch it grow. But until then I want everyone to start treating pregnancy with a little more care. You don’t know what your friend, sister, cousin or co-worker might be going through. Some words that seem harmless can be extremely painful to someone who has experience a loss like this.
We are fragile. I am fragile and I am no longer embarrassed to be.
– Kassandra

Ipsy March Glam Bag Review

NYX Cosmetics – Liquid Suede Cream Lipstick
nyxcosmetics.com
Full Size Retail Price: $7
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I am new to the NYX liquid lipsticks but I love them. This Suede Cream lipstick is super lightweight and glides on effortlessly and dries to a highly pigmented matte finish. NYX boasts that it is also waterproof so it’s long wearing.
Final Verdict: NYX liquid lipsticks are a must try!
Starlooks – Luxe Longwear Eye Pencil in Jet
starlooks.com
Full Size Retail Price $19
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Loving my introduction to Starlooks! This black eye pencil is highly pigmented and has a mechanical applicator. For those of you who remember life before mechanical pencils, for makeup and for writing, you know how great this is. The consistency is soft and glides on smoothly without pulling your eyelid which a lot of other eye pencils do.
Final Verdict: Must try up-and-coming beauty brand.
Living Proof – Perfect hair Day Dry Shampoo
www.livingproof.com
Full Size Retail Price: $12-$22
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I do not typically use dry shampoo’s but I have tried other Living Proof products so I gave this particular dry shampoo a try. The application is easy and leaves no residue as long as you spray just a enough to coat the root and blend into your scalp. It smells great and doesn’t leave any residue or build-up behind.
Final Verdict: Living Proof is a fantastic haircare brand!
TEMPTU – Warm Glow Bronzer
Full Size Retail Price: $64 Sun Kissed AirPod Bundle
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It is know doubt that TEMPTU products are uber professional and their AirPods give you an all over coverage that can only be applied via airbrush. If you have the money to spend on high quality makeup application then TEMPTU is for you. Their bronzer is full coverage and super lightweight. The shade I have is definitely too dark for me and even when applying a small bit of product I received a lot of highly pigmented coverage (see photo).
Final Verdict: Great for those who have the time (and $$$) to spend on their makeup.
Aphrodite Skin Care – Replenishing Eye Cream

Full Size Retail Price: $27.99

On Sale Now for $23.99
IMG_7348
The only time I try anything “anti-aging” is when I get a sample. At almost 27 I am not yet concerned with aging. Even though I know it’s never to early to combat aging. This eye cream is definitely hydrating and comes full of all the best ingredients like 0rganic extra virgin olive oil and high levels of natural active ingredients such as Argan Oil, Evening Primrose and Shea Butter. The only thing I didn’t like was that it did not absorb very quickly even when using a small amount (smaller than a dime).

Final Verdict: Not for me. Well maybe in like 20 more years.

What Order Do You Apply Your Makeup?

This is my everyday makeup routine, in order from the first item I put on my face to the last!
1. Moisturizer – I only use about a quarters size for my whole face and let is set before moving on to #2
2. Foundation – applied all over my face, including over and under my eyes
3. Concealer – under eyes and over any particularly bad acne spots
4. Bronzer – under my cheekbones, the edge of my forehead, jawline, and sides of my nose
5. Blush – brushed lightly across my cheekbones
6. Highlighter – under my eyes and the bridge of my nose
7. Eyebrows – filled in with a pencil and set with brow gel
8. Eyeshadow Primer – I dab it on my eye lids and the crease. I let it sit a minute so its feels sticky before applying eyeshadow
9. Eyeshadow – applied light to dark starting with the inside of the eye and ending with the crease
10. Eyeliner – always black with a little cat eye
11. Mascara – always black, waterproof for everyday
12. Lipstick – because after all that my lips look naked without it
In what order do you apply your makeup? When I wrote this all out now it feels like a lot but I can actually get it done in like 10 minutes. What do you think? Too much for an everyday routine?

A Very “Lush” Valentine’s Day

My fiance and I like to keep Valentine’s Day sweet and simple. Our anniversary is in March and we would rather spend the “big” money on that day. Plus since our anniversary isn’t a national, overly commercialized, holiday it tends to be a lot less busy and a lot cheaper. But like most couples we refuse to completely ignore Valentines Day choosing instead to treat it like any other day just with a bit more chocolate and a small something to say I love you.

IMG_6595

For me it was a hilarious card indicating his request that I wear less clothing. Who said romance is dead? And a magnificent smelling pink, sparkly gift bag. I could smell the contents as soon as he set it on my lap. It was the Unicorn Horn bubble bar and Rose Jam bubbleroon from Lush that I had hinted at wanting. The two bars are now currently residing in my master bath and I can smell them from my bed. Again my fiance and Lush completely hit it out of the park. He maybe spent $20-$25 dollars.

For him it was a card from Target with a lobster on the front reading “Beclaws I love you”. We are from Maine so this was a hoot. He is also really into these things called “Metal Earth” which are these small metal models that can be anything from an airplane to R2D2 from Star Wars. This time he received a drum set model. And of course Valentines isn’t complete without some chocolate in a heart shaped box. I maybe spent around $20 bucks in total.

All in all it was an extremely successful, non stressful and inexpensive Valentines day. I think more couples should try this minimalist approach to on otherwise ostentatious holiday. Maybe the single people would grumble less : )

What did you do for the big V-Day? And how do you feel about the day in general? Totally over done? Or a great day to show someone special some extra love?

Cutting the Red Thread

Recently I was introduced to the “red string of fate” or “red string of marriage” which is an East Asian belief found in both Chinese and Japanese legend. The legend basically states that the gods tie an invisible red cord around the ankles of those that are destined to meet one another in a certain situation or help each other in a certain way.

The two people connected by the red thread are destined to be lovers, regardless of place, time or circumstances. The red thread can be stretched and tangled but can never break.

the_red_string_of_fate_by_kasandraleigh-d545drg

The Red String of Fate by Kassandraleigh

This concept of the “red string of fate” or what us Westerners like to call “soulmates” is a concept I have given a lot of thought to. Having met what most would call my soulmate at 15 in high school I have spent many nights over the last ten years pondering our connection and the circumstances that led us to find each other.

If you asked me if I thought we were “meant to be”, I would say no. Being a very logical and practical person I think the idea of David being my soulmate is an insult to the time and energy we both have put into ensuring the growth and success of our relationship. I also think telling someone who is struggling to find their life mate that they just haven’t found “the one” yet is complete fantasy.

Yes, David and I were lucky enough to find each other at a time in our lives where we both were amenable to the idea of forever with each other or even with someone else. We happened to believe in the idea that dating in pursuit of marriage and family made more sense than dating around. We are always told that when we get older we will be able to make the big decisions about who to marry, where to live, or even what type of job we want. There are some of us who just know from the beginning. There is no magical string connecting us. Just a belief in our own futures and the strength to go forth and accomplish what we want.

My love for David has nothing to do with an invisible red thread and if I was proved wrong and could see it surrounding us, connecting us, I would cut it just to prove what we have is so much more than fate.

What do you think? Do you think there is someone out there at the end of your red thread waiting for you? Or is life and love what you make it?

Rocksbox Review & FREE Month Code

Recently I was offered an opportunity to join Rocksbox as part of their influencer community. I was extremely excited to be offered the opportunity because I am a total accessories girl and jewelry is something I cannot get enough of. I accepted their offer and received my first Rocksbox set within a couple weeks.
I am really excited to share the pieces I received (on loan) with you but want you to know that all reviews expressed are my own and not those of Rocksbox or the below mentioned designers.
 
Rocksbox

Rocksbox 2

Rocksbox Set #1 Review

My first experience with Rocksbox could not have been smoother. After signing up I went through and began filling my Wish List. Within a couple of weeks my box had arrived safely in my mailbox and I was so excited to see what my personal stylist, Molly, had picked out for me.
My fiance thought I had won the lottery when I opened up my box and found the Gorjana cuff from my Wish List right on top. It was my favorite item that I had added to my list and was so surprised that I actually received it in my first box. The other two pieces were styled around the cuff and both were items I had considered adding to my list. I actually ended up purchasing the Sophie Harper studs.
Gorjana
Elea Cuff in Silver
Retail $135 – $108 Insiders’ Price
Gorjana Cuff
Bella Boutique
Diana Long Pear Pendant in Silver Blue Cat’s Eye
Retail $81 – $64 Insiders’ Price
Bella Boutique Necklace
Sophie Harper
Pavé Dagger Studs in Silver
Retail $35 – $28 Insiders’ Price
Sophie Harper Dagger Studs
About a month after receiving my box, I purchased the earrings, popped the box back into the mailer with the conveniently provided return label and off it went.
Now I am patiently awaiting my next Rocksbox! It really is that simple.
How to Rocksbox (and FREE month code): 
Step 1: Sign Up! It’s only $19/mo and with my code lostgirlblogxoxo you can get your first month free!
Step 2: Take the style survey and add items to your jewelry Wish List.
Step 3: Receive three pieces, on loan, to wear as much as you want!
Step 4: Return anytime to get three new pieces. It’s literally that simple!
Shine Insider Benefits
Fallen in love with a piece? You get $10 a month shine spend to apply towards a purchase.
Free, prepaid shipping both ways.