Recently I was introduced to the “red string of fate” or “red string of marriage” which is an East Asian belief found in both Chinese and Japanese legend. The legend basically states that the gods tie an invisible red cord around the ankles of those that are destined to meet one another in a certain situation or help each other in a certain way.
The two people connected by the red thread are destined to be lovers, regardless of place, time or circumstances. The red thread can be stretched and tangled but can never break.
This concept of the “red string of fate” or what us Westerners like to call “soulmates” is a concept I have given a lot of thought to. Having met what most would call my soulmate at 15 in high school I have spent many nights over the last ten years pondering our connection and the circumstances that led us to find each other.
If you asked me if I thought we were “meant to be”, I would say no. Being a very logical and practical person I think the idea of David being my soulmate is an insult to the time and energy we both have put into ensuring the growth and success of our relationship. I also think telling someone who is struggling to find their life mate that they just haven’t found “the one” yet is complete fantasy.
Yes, David and I were lucky enough to find each other at a time in our lives where we both were amenable to the idea of forever with each other or even with someone else. We happened to believe in the idea that dating in pursuit of marriage and family made more sense than dating around. We are always told that when we get older we will be able to make the big decisions about who to marry, where to live, or even what type of job we want. There are some of us who just know from the beginning. There is no magical string connecting us. Just a belief in our own futures and the strength to go forth and accomplish what we want.
My love for David has nothing to do with an invisible red thread and if I was proved wrong and could see it surrounding us, connecting us, I would cut it just to prove what we have is so much more than fate.
What do you think? Do you think there is someone out there at the end of your red thread waiting for you? Or is life and love what you make it?